Setting up boundaries to be a healthier person

My brother-in-law is a runner and is very dedicated to it.  He faithfully makes time every day to run.  It doesn’t matter what the weather is like outside, or if it’s a special holiday, he just does it.   How he can pull this kind of dedication off when there are so many things vying for his attention? The answer is, he puts himself first.

I want to have this same freedom that my brother-in-law has.  He takes care of number One, first and foremost.  No one stops him from meeting his daily goals. This regular routine is keeping him fit and on track to staying healthy.

Recognizing the need to be as disciplined as him, I examined my life and who I am.  I realize I am a people pleaser, and if I put myself first, that would make me feel selfish.   Like most moms, I put my family members and friends first, before my needs. I’m so busy doing for others that when it gets time for me, my energy is zapped.   I don’t like letting people down.  Making myself available to them, means any plans that I have are usually shelved for a later day or time.

This has been part of my weight loss problem.  When I do stay focused and disciplined I push other people aside.  As I start to get resistance from them, guilt sets in and I fail to continue to look after me.

However, looking in the mirror tells me I have let myself down and I can’t do that anymore.   Learning to take care of me has been a difficult battle.  Putting boundaries around my relationships gives me back the control I need. I am in the driver’s seat once again.  I am learning to be assertive and recognize that I am worth it.  Taking steps to keep these boundaries in place is necessary for me to succeed at this weight loss and to grow as a person.

I’m realizing it’s okay to say no to people or to let them know I would be available at a later time or date.  Yes, people do get disgruntled and angry with me, and I do sway sometimes, but I’m getting better at it.

I have discovered that I am worth it and I’m not going to let myself down any longer.

I have drawn the line in the sand and I’m beginning to reap the benefits, one baby step at a time.

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